HONOUR TO WHOM HONOUR
BIBLE PASSAGE: MARK 7:9-13; 1 TIMOTHY 5:1-8
Picture taken from Google
Lesson Prepared by: Krisha of
Solomon’s Wisdom FB page
MEMORY VERSE
Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days
may be long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.
EXODUS 20:12
INTRODUCTION:
There comes a time in
every child’s life when they cross into adulthood. In some ways, the moment is
culturally defined. For example, in the Jewish tradition, a boy is considered a
man at 13. In America, the threshold of adulthood recognized by law is 18. In
the Philippines, Filipinos are known for strong and close family ties and even
adult children would like to stay with parents if it’s possible especially if the
child is single.
But when time comes when parent
reaches adulthood, there will be situations where the parents need somebody to
look out for them and most of the time, this is the problem faces by the
children. When the children become adult and got married, their support and
concern became less because of so many life’s circumstances but who will be
responsible to look out for the parents?
When God gave the Ten Commandments,
honoring the parents is included. Sometimes when children got married, they
forget to still have connection to their parents. Exodus 20:12 says, “Honour thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be
long upon the land which the Lord thy God giveth thee.”. It’s easy to overlook
this, but this is the first commandment with a promise, that if you honor your father and mother, “your days may be long in the land.”
In the last line of Romans 13:7 “… custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honour
to whom honour” and this is where the of our lesson
title came from and in tagalog means “Gumalang sa nararapat igalang.” May this lesson remind us of whom to honour>
LESSON OUTLINE:
1. CARING FOR AGING PARENTS PLEASES THE
LORD (1 TIMOTHY 5:4)
“But if any widow have children or nephews, let them learn first to shew piety at
home, and to requite their parents: for
that is good and acceptable before God.”
Tagalog: “Kung ang isang babaing balo ay may mga anak o
apo, ang mga ito ang dapat kumalinga sa kanilang magulang bilang pagtanaw ng
utang na loob, sapagkat ito ang
nakalulugod sa Diyos.”
There is
the Millennials called to action! Just as a parent, at one time, cared for
every need of an infant child, so also it is right and proper for adult child
or grandchildren to care for the elderly. In supporting the elderly, I love how
Paul says that this makes “some return to their parents (requite- pagtanaw ng
utang na loob).” After all the care parents gave to their children, children
should look at it as returning the favor.
There are
some ways to honor our parents: BE THANKFUL TO THEM AND SHOW YOUR GRATITUDE, COMMUNICATE
WITH THEM, TALK TO THEM AND TREAT THEM WITH RESPECT, SEEK THEIR ADVICE AND
WISDOM, PRAY FOR THEM (WITH THEM), ENCOURAGE YOUR PARENTS, FORGIVE THEM, and
TAKE CARE OF YOUR PARENTS.
As
we go through the daily trials of life, we sometimes forget that our parents
are going through difficulties, as well. There are financial struggles, health
issues, friends and loved ones passing away and more.
Additionally,
if you struggle honoring your parents, ask God to help you in this area but
remember when you were in your mother’s womb, “For thou
hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb,” you were helpless. And most
importantly, honoring your parents is good
and acceptable before God.
2. CARING FOR AGING PARENTS IS PUTTING
FAITH INTO PRACTICE (1 TIMOTHY 5:8; MARK 7:9-13)
“But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his
household, he has denied the
faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
This is a
strong indictment on believing children who stubbornly refuse to show any care
for parents. They refuse to make time sacrifices. They refuse to alter their
schedule. In arrogance, they are unconcerned about the social isolation or
growing needs of the elderly. Paul is saying that an adult child who claims
faith in Jesus has a biblical responsibility to consider the appropriate level
of care and support a parent needs. To flat out refuse or reject giving care to
aging parents is utmost to rejecting the faith.
Mark 7:9-13
say, 9 And he said unto them, Full well ye reject the
commandment of God, that ye may keep your own tradition. 10 For Moses said, Honour thy father and
thy mother; and, Whoso curseth father or mother, let him die the death: 11 But
ye say, If a man shall say to his father or mother, It is Corban, that is to
say, a gift, by whatsoever thou mightest be profited by me; he shall be free. 12 And
ye suffer him no more to do ought for his father or his mother;13 Making
the word of God of none effect through your tradition, which ye have delivered:
and many such like things do ye.
a. For Moses said: The Old
Testament clearly laid out the responsibility of children to honor their
parents. When children are young and in their parent’s household, they are also
responsible to obey their parents. But even
when they are no longer responsible to obey, they are still
responsible to honor.
b. Whatever profit
you might have received from me is Corban: In this
practice, a son could say that his possessions or savings were Corban – that
is, especially devoted to God – and therefore unavailable to help his parents.
c. Making the word
of God of no effect through your tradition: Through
this, a son could completely disobey the command to honor your
father or mother and do it while being ultra-religious. Jesus
called this making the word of God of no effect through your
tradition.
We can say
based on these verses that children ought to help their parents especially
when they are not capable and old.
Change has to happen at home within our
families as we communicate the importance of caring for grandparents with our
children. They must see it modeled and
lived out in the carefree times and in the difficult ones too. The world
around us has to see us as believers in Jesus Christ live out the command to
“love one another”. They should be in awe of the love and care we have for our
families. The Gospel must be lived out in our homes. Our
lives should be so attractive to non-believers that they would desire to know
about the God we serve and love.
3. CARING FOR AGING PARENTS IS FIRST JOB
OF THE FAMILY, NOT THE CHURCH (1 TIMOTHY 5:16)
“If any man
or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the
church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed.”
We can see in our society that there are children who neglect
their parents in their old age. There are many reasons why this happens, maybe
because of poverty and possible their mindset is different but in a Christian
point of view, this may not be the case. Christians should know their duties as
children. Most Christians, depend on the church they belong with. Their
responsibilities diverted to the church.
In the previous verses we have read and, in this verse, 1 Timothy 5:16,
has answers with this family situation. “If any man
or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the
church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed.”
In other words, the church already has enough burdens. The
burden of giving care to the elderly is primarily the responsibility of family
members. When the elderly need help with medical support, resources, travel to
doctor visits, liquidation of assets, meal preparation, and anything else, the
first line of defense is the family unit. This is their calling. Yes, there are
instances where the elderly have no family and need the support of the local
church. But let us not overlook the fact that the family unit holds the
primary position of supporting the elderly.
1 Timothy 5:5 “Now she
that is a widow indeed, and desolate, trusteth in God, and continueth in
supplications and prayers night and day.”
Paul concluded with a principle he
alluded to three times in this section (1 Timothy 5:4, 5, and 8). The first
responsibility for support is at the home; the local church is to support the
truly destitute who are godly.
CONCLUSION:
THE OTHER WOMAN by David Farrell.
Prov. 23:22 - "Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy
mother when she is old.."
After 21 years of marriage, I’ve discovered a new
way of keeping the spark of love and intimacy alive in my relationship with my
wife: I’ve recently started dating another woman.
It was my wife’s idea, actually "You know you
love her," she said one day, taking me by surprise. "Life is too
short. You need to spend time with the people you love."
"But I love you," I protested. "I
know, but you also love her. You probably won’t believe me, but I think that if
the two of you spend more time together, it will bring the two of us
closer."
As usual, Peggy was right. The other woman that my wife was encouraging me to date was my mother.
My mom is a seventy-one-year-old widow who has
lived alone since my father died nineteen years ago. Right after his death, I
moved 2,500 miles away to California, where I started my own family and career.
When I moved back near my hometown five years ago,
I promised myself I would spend more time with her.
But somehow with the demands of my job and three
kids, I never got around to seeing her much beyond family get-togethers and
holidays.
She was surprised and suspicious when I called and
suggested the two of us go out to dinner and a movie. "What’s wrong? Are
you moving my grandchildren away?" she asked.
My mother is the type of woman who thinks anything
out of the ordinary - a late-night phone call or a surprise dinner invitation
from her eldest son - signals bad news.
"I thought it would be nice to spend some time
with you," I said. "Just the two of us." She considered that
statement for a moment. "I’d like that," she said. "I’d like
that a lot."
I found myself nervous as I drove to her house
Friday after work. I had the predate jitters - and all I was doing was going
out with my mother, for Pete’s sake!
What would we talk about? What if she didn’t like
the restaurant I chose? Or the movie? What if she didn’t like either?
When I pulled into her driveway, I realized how
excited she, too, was about our date. She was waiting by the door with her coat
on. Her hair was curled.
She was smiling. "I told my lady friends that
I was going out with my son, and they were all impressed," she said as she
got into my car. "They can’t wait until tomorrow to hear about our
evening."
We didn’t go anywhere fancy, just a neighborhood
place where we could talk. When we got there my mother clutched my arm - half
out of affection and half to help her negotiate the steps into the dining room.
Once we were seated, I had to read the menu for
both of us. Her eyes only see large shapes and shadows. Halfway through listing
the entrees, I glanced up. Mom was sitting across the table, just looking at
me. A wistful smile traced her lips.
"I used to be the menu reader when you were
little," she said. I understood instantly what she was saying. From
caregiver to cared-for, from cared-for to caregiver; our relationship had come
full circle. "Then it’s time for you to relax and let me return the
favor," I said.
We had a nice talk over dinner. Nothing
earth-shattering, just catching up with each other’s lives. We talked so much
that we missed the movie.
"I’ll go out with you again, but only if you
let me buy dinner next time," my mother said as I dropped her off. I
agreed.
"How was your date?" my wife wanted to
know when I got home that night. "Nice... nicer than I thought it would
be," I said. She smiled her I-told-you-so smile.
Since that night I’ve been dating Mom regularly. We
don’t go out every week, but we try to see each other at least a couple of
times a month. We always have dinner, and sometimes we take in a movie, too.
Mostly, though, we just talk. I tell her about my
daily trials at work. I brag about the kids and my wife. She fills me in on the
family gossip I can never seem to keep up on.
She also tells me about her past. Now I know what
it was like for my mom to work in a factory during World War II. I know about
how she met my father there, and how they nurtured a trolley-car courtship
through those difficult times.
As I’ve listened to these stories, I’ve come to
realize how important they are to me. They are my history. I can’t get enough
of them.
But we don’t just talk about the past. We also talk
about the future. Because of health problems, my mother worries about the days
ahead. "I have so much living to do," she told me one night. "I
need to be there while my grandchildren grow up. I don’t want to miss any of
it."
Like a lot of my baby-boomer friends, I tend to
rush around, filling my At-a-Glance calendar to the brim as I struggle to fit a
career, family and relationships into my life. I often complain about how
quickly time flies.
Spending time with my mom has taught me the
importance of slowing down. I finally understand the meaning of a term I’ve
heard a million times: quality time.
Peggy was right. Dating another woman has helped my
marriage. It has made me a better husband and father, and hopefully, a better
son.
Thanks, Mom. I love you.
From a sermon by Bobby Scobey, Mother’s Day 10 -
Real Mothers, 5/3/2010
